The new obstacles

Okay, so here are the obstacles that have been confirmed by Inui's Twitter for Sasuke 31:

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602693337385046017

So, for our first obstacle, we're bringing back the classic Barrel Climb. Personally, I don't really love this one as the start, I think Quintuple Step to Tarzan Rope is way more fun. This one is only fun when people realized they are screwed, lies down and pretty much accepts death. I know it's a classic, but still ...

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602693975087026176

I can't believe the TACKLE MACHINE is back!? Of all fucking obstacles? This one was in like half a competition back in the 90s, and I just assumed that we all moved on a pretended it was never a thing. But nope, it's back. It does not really fit well into the first stage, you know ...

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602694315194777601

There's supposed to be a third new obstacle on first stage, but so far no one seems to know what that is. I didn't really understand this tweet, but running it through Google Translate made it a little more coherent:

"New third area, "Music Box" was scattered forgot to take photos w

I'm sorry"

My guess is this means the third new first stage obstacle is called Music Box. I know what this means!!!

You know I'm right.

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602694590068445184

I googled "Salmon Radar", but all I found was this:

Source: http://www.radomes.org

Which means that they're either going golfing (I guess Shingo and Hioki would be happy to hear that!) or they're brining back the Big Boulder:

Source: http://sasukepedia.wikia.com/wiki/%C5%8Cdama

This doesn't seem right. Let's see what Google translate has to say:

"2nd Stage minor renewed salmon ladder to climb and down."

Ooohhh, another Salmon Ladder that you climb up and down. That actually sounds a lot more reasonable, now that you mention it ...

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602694986333704192

Here's something brand-new:  a third stage obstacle called the Sidewinder! I think you grab onto a penis and swing across, but I'm not sure. Unless you spin on them and them jump, but they seem way too far apart for that.

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602705993487650816

Here we see that we start with the Drumhopper before getting to Siderwinder. That's cool, I really like the Drumhopper. It's exactly the kind of shit I'm expected from Sasuke third stage.

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602695617337380864

And I don't know about you guys but I've always felt the Vertical Limit was waaay too easy, so naturally adding a sideways jump was the only way to go. Like. Of course. Especially after the Crazy Cliffhanger - the obstacle I think they wanted gone because it was too hard??? This makes sense.

Also, notice how the CCH has water underneath it instead of fire, I'm gonna take that as the final proof that I didn't win that obstacle contest ...

Actually ... does any of these obstacles look like something we were shown in that broadcast? I can't find them among my screencaps at least.

Oh, well, we'll have to wait until the broadcast I guess. Until then - sayonara ninja lovers!

What happens on Sasuke, stays on Sasuke ... apparently

Sasuke 31 is over! If I hadn't had Eurovision to worry about (FUCK YEAH SWEDEN), I don't think what I would've done with myself this weekend. Twitter has been way too silent, if you're asking me, but at least we know a few thing. Such as the running order for the contestants, which can be found here in Japanese, or partly translated here. Us hipsters are very happy to see the cute guy Matachi Ryo as #100, though we are also upset that some of our faves are missing entirely, like Wakky, Kinnikun, Lee En-Chih and Mr Octopus Man.

But, our very own Swedish ninja Alexander Mars got #84, which is cool. We are of course hoping he did well, and I did stalk down this pic of him in front of final stage:

Source: https://instagram.com/p/3BjdhOxOAT/

The only American we like Drew Drechsel also took a bunch of selfies, which is not something that can be said for any of the other ninjas. Excuse you!? I refuse to believe there wasn't a single selfiestick present, and I can only assume these are being kept from us for some devious reason. So not fetch.

Source: https://instagram.com/p/3CLm0JC1Pj/

Source: https://instagram.com/p/3CLWgAi1Ow/

Source: https://instagram.com/p/3DG0W1C1Ei/

Since Drew is the only one delivering on the selfie front I'll cheer a little extra for him when I finally get to watch the competition.

Source: https://twitter.com/hanaisensehi/status/602723569240379392

Oh, and Inui retweeted these two. I don't know who they are (except one is an atlethe?), but they look awesome and dare I dream about a girl clearing first stage again???

Here are some more official tweets from the competition:

Source: https://twitter.com/sasuke_tbs/status/602160815383285760

The new start line! And apparently they were up until 2 pm... wait that's not right. I'm assuming it's actually 2 am. People were apparently happy, so good for them!

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602404114492837888

For this we can conclude that they did first and second stage during the first day, and then had to wait until it was dark the second day to finish filming the last two stages.

Source: https://twitter.com/sasuke_tbs/status/602408610820280320

As far as I know Sasuke is usually filmed during one day, but here it's explained that it's been split into two days for safety reasons. I guess that isn't as hardcore, but it's not as third and final stage would EVER be easy, even with some rest beforehand...

Source: https://twitter.com/cocona201345/status/602434769016655872

While everyone talked about the next day of filming, Shingo tweeted about his newly opened gym. Does this mean he wasn't there the second day, or is he just trying to throw us off???

Source: https://twitter.com/sasuke_tbs/status/602442549106647041

Third stage! At least we know someone got there. Actually ...

Source: https://twitter.com/sasuke_tbs/status/602528383054950401

It seems confirmed that someone even reached final stage! I can't even begin to list the people I want there, but Asa and Ryo are high on the list (especially Asa. I will cry if he doesn't make it past the crazy cliffhanger this year) ... and let's be real, I would love for Alexander Mars to get there too, but fuck if I think he will. The Swedish Ninja Warrior course just isn't enough preparation for Sasuke.

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602552757388648449

And then it was over! Out of nowhere. It seems to have gone well, and even if we don't know if someone will Kanzenseiha (no I don't think that's a verb, no I don't care) this year, we will get to see all four stages which is AWESOME.

Inui also tweeted about some of the new obstacles, but you'll have to wait for my post on those until tomorrow. There are rumors floating around saying Sasuke 31 will be broadcast on July 1st, but as far as I can tell that's not confirmed yet. We will keep you posted!

Until then ... sayonara ninja lovers!

It's so close we can taste it

Sasuke 31 starts taping in FIVE DAYS. That's in no time at all!

As if things weren't real enough, THEY ARE CONSTRUCTING THE STAGES NOW. Yesterday there was even a Nico Nico broadcast where they showed the assembly of Final Stage, but of course I totally missed out on that by sleeping through it. I thought the point of liking a Japanese show was that things would not air in the middle of the night??? Okay so it wasn't actually middle of the night, but who is awake at 6 am on a Saturday? Not me, that's for sure.

Oh, well, luckily there's a good recap of it over at Rambling Rican's, so I know what I missed, which wasn't much. Not many surprises there: I didn't expect Akiyama or Bunpei to show up, nor any of the other older competitors. I won't miss the Hedgehog or Long Jump too much either, and I'm glad that there's at least one Warped Wall! Now, if they could just bring back Half-Pipe Attack, aka the best First Stage obstacle ever, that would be awesome.

Anyway, we are not the only ones who are excited! I took to Twitter to see how our favourite competitors are preparing for the competion next week:

Source: https://twitter.com/urushiharayuuji/status/599150097469820929

Urushihara and a mysterious masked man took to the pool for some Backstream-training. Hmm, I wonder who THAT could be ...

Source: https://twitter.com/urushiharayuuji/status/599212985693773824

Nice, hooray! Yeah, I don't think anyone was surprised by that reveal. We all know this obstacle is their nemesis ...

Sorry, but this was the greatest moment in television history and no one can tell me differently.

Source: https://twitter.com/sasuke_tbs/status/599383415670976512

The start of the final stage construction! It's weird, because I know I read somewhere that Final Stage construction doesn't start until they're sure people will actually compete in it, but I always thought that sounded like total bullshit and now I know it's not true. It is finished in just a day though!

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/599466549510975488

Words cannot describe how excited I am for the steel muscle festival!

Source: https://twitter.com/37Mistr/status/599801980173684736

Oh, and more great news: MR SASUKE IS NOW ON TWITTER. I haven't told Chriss this yet, because I wanted to dramatically reveal it on the blog. He's not competing, but the black tigers are and seems to be ready! I hope they do well, they have been a bit disappointing in the last Sasukes. I'm also kinda glad Mr Sasuke is not competing, because that means he won't be cut like last year.

Source: https://twitter.com/hiokimasashi/status/599595067536379904

Of course Urushihara is eating Shingo's wife's homemade cake, that guy tweets about food 90% of the time. I didn't screen print it but I'm pretty sure I also saw Kanno saying something about drinking beer for protein. The Sasuke diets are very interesting. Shingo himself seems to mostly be talking about the gym he's about to open and not preparing too much, but then again we all know that no amount of training is going to save him from Shingo'ing it up at some point...

Source: https://twitter.com/hitoshi_kanno/status/599729345742024704

I don't know what this means, but whatever. This is the amount of selfies we're already getting, and even though we won't know the results of Sasuke 31 for months I AM SO EXCITED FOR THE AMOUNT OF SELIFES THAT WILL BE TAKEN. I will be fucking pissed if no one brings their selfie stick to the competition to give us at least SOMETHING.

Source: https://twitter.com/sasuke_tbs/status/599816233177853952

Someone went to pray for a good Sasuke and safe competitors. Good idea, we do want to see spectacular fails and clears, but we don't want people to actually hurt themselves while they're at it. Except for Torisawa Katsuhide, of course, but hurting himself is kinda his thing.

Source: https://twitter.com/fujinosasuke/status/599854542235111424

The final adjustments! I'm not sure what the bathing is about, but Green Mountain of course means Midoiryama so I think we all know what they're preparing for. I think this is Kanno Hitoshi, Kishimoto Shinya (third stage in Sasuke 30), Kawaguchi Tomohiro (final stage in Sasuke 30) and Nagasaki Shunsuke (also third stage in Sasuke 30). Though why an earlier tweet from Nagasaki Shunsuke was in Chinese I don't know ...

Well, that's it for now, but I'm sure we'll all just be more and more psyched for the next few days. I'm extremely jealous of anyone who gets to go see it being taped, but you know ... next year I'll win Ninja Warrior SE and then I'll be there, so it's okay. For now let's just wish Rambling Rican a nice trip, and hope that Alexander Mars does GREAT in the competition as well. We're rooting for you, Alexander!! We're all rooting for you!

But until we know more ... Sayonara ninja lovers!

Our apologies

We do apologize for the lack of updates during the past weeks. Ninja Warrior UK didn't really appeal to us, and we haven't heard much about Sasuke Vietnam (except it finished taping and will air in October?). Sasuke 31 will be shooting in a few weeks and we obviously can't wait for that, and then there's American Ninja Warrior 7, which I'll definitely force Chriss to watch despite how we feel about it...

And I hear UK is moving on to stage 2/semis next week, which definitely will be worth giving a chance. Yeah, there are plenty of things on the Sasuke horizon.

Until then: sayonara ninja lovers!

Audition! :D

Hej, remember that awesome audition video I made for Ninja Warrior Sweden? Well, it must've impressed more people than just us hipsters, because I'm set to audition for the new season!

I first heard back from them a couple of weeks ago and was asked to submit a lot more information about myself, how much I work out and why I wanna do this (so I can go to Japan and compete in Sasuke, duuh) and while it did say "you'll be asked to go to an audition in a few weeks" I didn't dare assume I would get one... why get my hopes up, you know?

But today it was confirmed I'll be auditioning during the first week of June! I don't know where, when or how it'll happen, but I least I know that it will and that's good enough for me.

It's been a terrible week, so these were the kind of news I really needed. Now remember to send good thoughts out into the universe and hope I get to go on the show!