The new obstacles

Okay, so here are the obstacles that have been confirmed by Inui's Twitter for Sasuke 31:

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602693337385046017

So, for our first obstacle, we're bringing back the classic Barrel Climb. Personally, I don't really love this one as the start, I think Quintuple Step to Tarzan Rope is way more fun. This one is only fun when people realized they are screwed, lies down and pretty much accepts death. I know it's a classic, but still ...

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602693975087026176

I can't believe the TACKLE MACHINE is back!? Of all fucking obstacles? This one was in like half a competition back in the 90s, and I just assumed that we all moved on a pretended it was never a thing. But nope, it's back. It does not really fit well into the first stage, you know ...

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602694315194777601

There's supposed to be a third new obstacle on first stage, but so far no one seems to know what that is. I didn't really understand this tweet, but running it through Google Translate made it a little more coherent:

"New third area, "Music Box" was scattered forgot to take photos w

I'm sorry"

My guess is this means the third new first stage obstacle is called Music Box. I know what this means!!!

You know I'm right.

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602694590068445184

I googled "Salmon Radar", but all I found was this:

Source: http://www.radomes.org

Which means that they're either going golfing (I guess Shingo and Hioki would be happy to hear that!) or they're brining back the Big Boulder:

Source: http://sasukepedia.wikia.com/wiki/%C5%8Cdama

This doesn't seem right. Let's see what Google translate has to say:

"2nd Stage minor renewed salmon ladder to climb and down."

Ooohhh, another Salmon Ladder that you climb up and down. That actually sounds a lot more reasonable, now that you mention it ...

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602694986333704192

Here's something brand-new:  a third stage obstacle called the Sidewinder! I think you grab onto a penis and swing across, but I'm not sure. Unless you spin on them and them jump, but they seem way too far apart for that.

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602705993487650816

Here we see that we start with the Drumhopper before getting to Siderwinder. That's cool, I really like the Drumhopper. It's exactly the kind of shit I'm expected from Sasuke third stage.

Source: https://twitter.com/inuimasato/status/602695617337380864

And I don't know about you guys but I've always felt the Vertical Limit was waaay too easy, so naturally adding a sideways jump was the only way to go. Like. Of course. Especially after the Crazy Cliffhanger - the obstacle I think they wanted gone because it was too hard??? This makes sense.

Also, notice how the CCH has water underneath it instead of fire, I'm gonna take that as the final proof that I didn't win that obstacle contest ...

Actually ... does any of these obstacles look like something we were shown in that broadcast? I can't find them among my screencaps at least.

Oh, well, we'll have to wait until the broadcast I guess. Until then - sayonara ninja lovers!