A sad day for the Sasuke Hipsters

One thing that allowed us to became so utterly obsessed with this show is that Chriss have been staying with me for the past six months, and therefore we've been watching TV together every night. Other friends, who are not sharing this tiny apartment with me, can probably never get into Sasuke the way we did when we spent all our evenings watching the show together.

Well, today Chriss officially moved back home to her parents. She'll obviously be back to hang out with me, but we'll be living 600 kms apart, and it won't be the same. 

Don't worry about the blog though. There's Skype for when we wanna watch Ninja Warrior SE, and I've already got plenty of notes for recaps of the Sasuke episodes we have watched. Worry more about us: we have a pact saying neither can watch a new episode of Sasuke without the other, so from now on we can only go back and rewatch stuff we've already seen.

We had a good last night though. It was my birthday, and while I did not get a Ninja Warrior party, we did have cake and watched Sasuke 27, with our friend who spent most of her time side-eyeing us when were fangirling a liiiittle too hard. But that's just how we roll.

Ninja Warrior SE: episode 6 recap

Air date: 26 February 2015

Obstacle fails:

Who went on to the third stage:

Source: kanal5play.se

And total passes in semi final 1 & 2:

Source: kanal5play.se

Once again I'm confused: will Henning and David lose their places if more than 5 people pass in the next two semifinals? That's how this image makes it seem, but it also specifies that they made it to the final, so I'm not entirely sure. My guess for now is that Kanal5 is deliberately showing us them in the order that makes the episodes the most dramatical, and that the people failing the course didn't know they made it until the end of the day. I mean, it makes for better TV, doesn't it?

__________________________________________________

Chriss & Ell commentary:

First out is our fave Bernhard Dalsheim, who delivers the line "I'm gonna take it slow, 'cause I'm very out of shape" (which isn't true, he has a lot of muscles, but clearly not much endurance). Sadly, Bernhard failed, but he told us in Japanese that he'll be back next year. We hope so!

~*~

Konstantinos Tzaos tells us his approach to Ninja Warrior SE; "I'm gonna pretend the water is lava", which reminds me of this tweet:

Source: https://twitter.com/oskimonster/status/563460693287268352

Translation: "Super course? The Swedish version is just slightly harder than Musical Chairs, for crying out loud!"

~*~ 

Daniel Sköld, the competitor who failed the Hang Glider (interestingly I can only remember that it happened once in the qualifying round, but we've seen two do it in the semis), is at least going all out on his ninja look. Inspiring dude, truly inspiring.

Source: Kanal5play.se

~*~

David Marberg, who failed the arm rings but still got a spot in the final/third stage, got the nickname "The Swedish Chuck Norris" ... well, you can guess why:

Source: Kanal5play.se

The Swedish commentators of course found this hilarious.

Adam Alsing: "Mårten, how do you think the real Chuck Norris would handle the Jump Hang?"

Mårten Nylén: "Ehh, I don't know."

Adam Alsing: "No, because the question is really HOW WOULD THE JUMP HANG HANDLE CHUCK NORRIS?"

I mean that comment isn't super-funny, but he sounded so fucking proud of himself for pulling it off that it is without a doubt the funniest commentator moment so far.

~*~

Martin Lindh didn't get the greatest time in this ep, but as we all know, as long as you finish, you've still got a chance to finish the course, so we're not counting him out just yet. Especially not given his line of work ...

Source: Kanal5play.se

Chriss: "Oh! A fireman! He should wear orange pants."

Do that next time, Martin, and you'll be our fave.

~*~

Camilo Lattof sadly didn't make it, but DAMN, that guy is still the only person in Ninja Warrior SE who has good technique on the Spider Walk, and that's a good enough reason for us to like him. Though naming him the Swedish Speed Demon was a bit much ...

~*~

We end with commentator Mårten Nylén saying that anything can happen in Ninja Warrior and he is absolutely right. That is one of the reasons we love it so much.

Ninja Warrior SE: episode 5 recap

Air date: 25 February 2015

How many people failed each obstacle?

Who went on to third stage/the final?

Source: Kanal5play.se

As you can see, four people cleared the stage, but five from each semi will go on to the third stage/the final. Henning Attlin (the only person in Ninja Warrior SE who could out-hipster us), failed the arm rings as well as four other guys, BUT he had the fastest time finishing the salmon ladder and that meant he went on to the final as well.

______________________________________________________

Chriss & Ell commentary:

They're making the rules overly complicated, aren't they? We watched Sasuke with basically no knowledge of the show and not understanding a word of Japanese, but we very quickly picked up on the simple rules: if you finish one stage, you go on to the next. If you don't, you're out. If no one finishes, then the show ends.

I mean, we're happy for Henning, of course, it's always nice when someone's impressively fast time is rewarded (Alexander Mars, with the best time this semifinal, reached the arm rings at least 30 seconds later than Henning, so had he finished his time could have been spectacular), but it ain't very Sasuke to let someone who failed a stage move on to the next.

Personally we think it would make more sense, if it's so incredibly important that 25 people reach the final (I think - but don't quote me on this - that this is 5 people from four semifinals, PLUS the 5 people with the best times over-all, but I might be wrong since they are being a bit vague on how it'll go down), that they should pick the person who got the furthest before failing, even if that would come down to centimeters in some cases.

In any case, there is a risk that we see six people complete second stage/the semi final in the next episode and that one of them won't even make it to the final because they let someone who failed pass the episode before that. Hopefully it won't happen, but it could, and it makes everything way more complicated than necessary.

Honestly, when you turn Sasuke into a competition like this, it feels like watching an entire season of American Ninja Warrior USA vs the world, and we're not loving it. Is the same system used in ANW? I know they let people move on to the next stage based on the time, but is the second stage/semi final done in heats like this?

~*~

Chriss: There should be more celebrities in the show, like they have on Sasuke.

Ell: Well, technically Kitsune is a gladiator, so she's a celebrity.

Chriss: Yeah, but they should get like ... Paolo Roberto for next season.

~*~

Announcer: "Only three people in the world have every completed Ninja Warrior."

Ell: "No, only three people in JAPAN."

Honestly, only the Japanese have done it, and I know they're trying to make it sound more awesome by phrasing it like that, but they are kinda erasing the fact that no non-Japanese person have ever been close to achieving Kanzenseiha when they never mention it. Hey, maybe I'm just overly protective of my faves.

~*~

Despite all our negativity we like the show, but we would love to see the New Stars from Sasuke take it on. They'd laugh all the way through and it'd be amazing.

~*~

And the ultimate proof that the rules are a little bit too confusing came from the announcers, when they repeatedly referred to the qualifying round as the semi when discussing one of the contestants. We know, it's confusing us too, and we should just stick to calling them first, second and third stage to make it simple.

~*~

One last thing: we totally missed that they are airing two Ninja Warrior SE eps this week. SWEET, more Ninja Warrior! Not sweet that we didn't realize this until today, and totally missed to recap this episode yesterday, when it aired. Because of that we will not be recaping today's ep until tomorrow. Sorry about that!

In their quest to become champion

Yes, I always work out with perfect hair and make-up, don't you?

Sooo, today was the day. Me and Chriss took her camera, my skills and went out to shoot my audition video for the next season of Ninja Warrior SE. We've been talking about it since, eh, we first saw Ninja Warrior, but I'm pretty sure most people thought we were just joking.

We were not.

We're not gonna show the video, but we can assure you it's amazing. Not because I'm amazing (although I kinda am), but because of the sound effects we added that took the entire thing to whole other (amazing) level. We'll publish it here someday and you will see why we've been laughing for two hours.

Until then, just wish me good luck!

Drew Drechsel

We're still very upset about USA vs. the World (yeah, yeah, we know, it was months ago, but to us it was, literally, yesterday), but we decided to try and let go of our anger, and instead focus on something positive.

Like how Drew Drechsel has been invited to compete in Sasuke 31! Drew is an American who has competed in American Ninja Warrior and Sasuke 27 and 30 (he's also the winner of the Asean cup-thingy, I think?), and has once again been chosen to represent the US in Sasuke. We're very happy for him! Right now he has a fundraiser, so he can actually afford to go to Japan, and you can find it by clicking on this large picture of him:

Source: Sasukepedia

Go forth brave warriors, and help this ninja achieve his goal!

Sasuke Hipsters vs the world

After staying up all night to watch the Oscars (terrible idea, don't do it), we're now watching the American Ninja Warrior USA vs the world special before we get to go to bed again (I mean, we have slept, some five hours after the Oscars ended at 6 in the morning here, but we have been more or less dead all day).

Not a good idea. We're obviously only in it for team Japan and they're not doing very well. In our tired state we're reacting worse than Asa whenever our faves fail. And saying not so nice things when the Americans succeed (which we won't repeat here: this is a hate-free blog).

Hmpf. This is why having it as a competition rather than a challenge is a bad idea. 

When watching Sasuke you can cheer anyone on because their success will not affect yours (or, if you're watching rather than competing, your faves) at all, and that's the beauty of it. You never have to wish for someone to fail so that someone else can succeed, but watching this it's hard not to, and that bothers me even more than the failures of team Japan.

Deep thoughts from a tired mind.

Oh, and when Team Sweden eventually is formed and I get to be on it, I'll be known as the #sasukehipster. You know were you heard it first. ;)

Sasuke 29: recap

Here's out first review of one of the Japanese broadcasts. Let's start with some general stats, for those looking for some quick info, that I compiled with information found on Wikipedia and Sasukepedia:

Air date: June 17 2013

Obstacles:

Bolded obstacles have no transition between them.

Results:

Notes: because of the SASUKE ASEAN OPEN CUP-thingy taking place later in 2013 only the person to finish third stage with the best time would have gone on to the final stage, although this never became an issue due to no one clearing third stage. Thank the gods BECAUSE THAT WAS A TERRIBLE IDEA since the best part about Sasuke is that everyone who clears a stage gets to go on to the next one.

________________________________________________________________

Chriss & Ell commentary:

Here we are, looking super-serious as we're embarking on yet another Sasuke adventure.

~*~

Torisawa Katsuhide starts strong by breaking a baseball bat on his neck.

Ell: "Just don't cut yourself like that guy did with a beer bottle."

Chriss: "Isn't this the same guy?"

Ell: "Yeah, you're right."

Ell: "You know, I think he did exactly this in Sasuke 24 as well."

~*~

Our friend Hanna kept texting us through-out this, since she was watching Sasuke for the first time with her husband. Made us feel like seasoned experts as she asked us questions about the show and the contestants, and - like us - wanting to get her hands on the USA vs Japan special. After she alerted us of the allegations of it being rigged Chriss did some research, and while we're not sure what to make of it, we're certainly in camp "it's fucking fishy that team Japan would lose so brutally as they did".

~*~

Then Hioki Masashi cleared first stage and we were all so happy for him:

So, um, happy we could cry apparently:

We can't decide what we love more: all the crying, or Matachi laughing at his crying friends. Not that he was fucking immune to it, though:

WIPING HIS EYES. He thought we wouldn't notice, but we did.

~*~

Chriss: "OH MY GOD, HE DROPPED HIS SHOE."

Ell: "WHAT!?"

Chriss: "Look!"

Ell: "It's still there, he's picking it up!"

~*~

WHY IS ASA WEARING A SCARF? WHAT IS UP WITH HIM AND SCARVES? I can't fucking deal with this anymore.

~*~

After Asa completely dominates first stage Matachi Ryo, Kanno Hitoshi and Urushihara Yuuji's attempts at first stage was completely cut, only showing them starting and finished. Naturally this was a bit upsetting.

Chriss: "They CUT him!? And we know he won't pass second stage! I can't believe this! I'm crying! ...oh, that's a cute baby!"

It is indeed a very cute baby. But not so cute that we'll forgive them for cutting out one of our faves like that.

~*~

Moving on to the second stage! Yamamoto Shingo times out during the water obstacle, giving us this shot:

Chriss: "There's an army of children again! They can't possibly all be his!"

This is basically brought up every time his army of children is shown, and we're still not sure what to make of it.

~*~

Looking at the water obstacle, a lot of people are struggling with it, not just Yamamoto Shingo (to our distress this includes Matachi Ryo).

Chriss: "Nagano would probably be great at this though, being a fisherman."

Ell: "Yeah, I hope he gets to try it sometime. He must be good at swimming if he works on a boat, right? Didn't we see him do situps on the side of his boat?
Chriss: Yeah."

Note: this is from the ANW special "25 reasons to watch Ninja Warrior"
also note I'm not 100% it is Nagano but you get the point

Ell: "You'd be insane to do that if you're not a good swimmer."

~*~

Chriss: "Did the announced just call Morimoto Yūsuke Sasuke-kun!? He's a tiny Sasuke boy."

~*~

After Morimoto fails third stage.

Chriss: "Where's Asa? Why isn't he crying!?"

~*~

If you're telling me you didn't cry when (what we're assuming is) Takahashi Kenji's daughter brought him a drawing of him achieving Kanzenseiha then get the fuck out of here, you grinch.

This is a show about ninjas and crying and we love it.

~*~

My last note just says "much crying :(" which I'm assuming is a reference to everyone failing third stage. My heart breaks just a little bit every time Asa fails the stupid Crazy Cliffhanger (okay, so it's not actually stupid, but I'm still upset about it!).

This concludes our Sasuke 29 recap, I hope you enjoyed it.

The clip that started it all

If you've been following our blog, you've probably already seen the famous clip from Ninja Warrior USA vs Japan, where Matachi Ryo takes on Stage 3. Since this clip is what started our obsession, we decided that we should take a closer look at it.

Haven't seen it before? No prob, here you go, feast your eyes!

In Stage 3 they had the following obstacles:

1. Roulette Cylinder

2. Doorknob Grasper

3. Floating Boards

4. Ultimate Cliffhanger

5. Bungee Rope Climb

6. Hang Climbing

7. Spider Flip

8. Flying Bar

(Can I just point out that Matachi Ryo's only ever done Ultimate Cliffhanger and Bungee Rope Climb in Sasuke before? At least according to my findings on Sasukepedia ...)

I mean, these obstacles are INSANE. Even Ezio has more to hold on to in Assassin's Creed II, for crying out loud!

Source: Gamespy

As we were watching it, I kept going "WHAT THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE" and I kinda looked like this:

So, yeah, it's amazing. And if you wanna know why we love this show, this is kinda it. Now, go watch the clip again!

Ninja Warrior SE: episode 4 recap

Air date: 19 February 2015

A quick rundown of how many people we got to see fail each obstacle:

Unless I miscounted (not entirely impossible) we saw more people CLEAR FIRST STAGE than we saw fail them.

Here are the names of the people who cleared it, hopefully I didn't mispell anything. I noted the times when I could, but when they just quickly show them pressing the button and skip everything else you do not get the timing, sadly:

Here's the Top Ten best times after episode 4:

Source: Kanal5play.se

As you can see, that's only two from this ep, Oskar Örn (damn, got his name wrong in my graph!) and Nathaphon Sermjan.

______________________________________________________

Chriss & Ell commentary:

Chriss: "I can't get over that they're calling it semifinal! That's so wrong!"

~*~

Seeing the Jump Hang again after watching Sasuke 6 yesterday, we're back to our standard "ninja please". That's what, 1 meter of jumping or something? It's nothing compared to Sasuke ...

~*~

We saw what we think might be the first instance of someone failing the Cross-Bridge, and noticed that there is no water underneath it? So if you're gonna fail something in this course, go with that or the Warped Wall and you won't get wet.

~*~

A girl we rooted for brutally failed.

Chriss: "Can I throw candy at your computer screen? I'll pick it up and eat it later, 'cause I can't afford to throw away candy."

~*~

We keep discussing our planned Ninja Warrior training for when I apply for the show. I'm gonna stand out and NOT be doing parkour, as idk, at least half the guys who are competing. I'm not sure what exactly I'm gonna do that's more awesome than that, but we'll figure something out.

~*~

"He speaks ninja", says the commentator about contestant Bernhard Dalsheim, which apparently means that he speaks Japanese. Dalsheims is apparently in love with Japan and gives us some advice on how you're supposed to eat sushi (with your hands, not chopsticks). We were mildy impressed ... until he cleared the course! Go Bernhard, but EVEN MORE, go Bernhard because when asked to say "I'm gonna be the first to win Ninja Warrior SE" in Japanese WE HEARD HIM SAY SASUKE.

First mention of Sasuke on this show - Bernhard Dalsheim, you are officially our favourite.

~*~

With Anna Lee Markstedt O'Dwyer (that name is a handful), we have four women in stage 2. If this is, as some people say, a better version that American Ninja Warrior, then I'm wondering if it just happens to be that Sweden has a lot more awesome women than the US and Japan? Or is the first stage just a lot easier? I guess we'll see what the future brings.

~*~

Even more celebration when Camilo Lattof had the best technique on the Spider-Walk, doing it like all the Japanese Ninjas on Sasuke are. He also cleared the Quintuple Step in just 2 seconds, although his final time wasn't that impressive compared to the top 10. We still like him.

Chriss: "I'm gonna call him Sweden's Speed Demon. I was gonna call him the Swedish Asa, but he didn't cry, so it doesn't really fit."

~*~

And finally we're treated to two parkour (no shit?) loving friends, Oskar Örn and Nathaphon Sermjan, who both cleared the stage with great times and did a little happy dance afterwards. It was very cute.

~*~

That's it! We are officially done with stage one, so next week we'll finally see what stage two brings. We have seen Salmon Ladder and Arm Rings in the previews so far, which works well with what that inaccurate Aftonbladet article told us, but I'm not trusting it until I see it all on TV.

Go home Aftonbladet, you're drunk

So, Swedish newspaper Aftonbladet tried their hands at writing an article about Sasuke, and, well, they didn't do very well. Luckily not too many people will read the article, because to access it you need their special "plus" subscription, which costs more and allows you to read pointless articles about what the actors in Dallas are doing today. And, of course, factually incorrect articles about Sasuke.

It kinda pisses me off even more that you'd have to pay for it and it's still competely wrong? I mean, yeah, it gets some things right: Sasuke started airing in 1997 in Japan, only three people have achieved Total Victory, and there is an American version of the show. They don't call it Sasuke though, only Ninja Warrior, which isn't technically incorrect, but would one mention of the original name kill them?

It gets worse when they try to present the only three people to ever achieve Total Victory, or Kanzenseiha as is the Japanese word for it. Sure, they get the basic stats on Akiyama Kazuhiko right, such as his age, height and which Sasuke he won. Well done. But then it gets a little iffy ...

Some are only small errors. Saying he "set a new record" when finishing final stage in Sasuke 4 is of course not wrong, but, er, of course he set a new record, no one else had ever finished it before him! It says he is now known as "Sasuke All-Star", but it isn't mentioned that this is a GROUP of people, not his personal nickname.

Then it says that "Galgfärden" in Sasuke 4 eliminated all other competitors. Galgfärden is the name they use for the Hang Glider in the Swedish competition, and that sure as fuck wasn't a part of Sasuke 4. I think they may mean the Pipe Slider, which no one but Akiyama finished in that one.

But it gets worse! They then inform us that he retired in "Sasuke 18", and isn't likely to return again. While he did retire in Sasuke 18, he has returned in Sasuke 20, 22, 24, 25 and 28. This isn't mentioned at all in the article though, leaving people to believe we haven't seen him since Sasuke 18. We have though, Aftonbladet, we have.

Then we get to the outright lie, stating that Akiyama usually has trouble with the Wall Lifting and the Spider Walk. Sure, he had trouble with the Wall Lifting the first two times he tried it, but never after that. In fact, looking at his stats at Sasukepedia, it is clear that the Warped Wall has brought him much more trouble. And the fucking Spider Walk??? Sasukepedia makes a point to say that he is the only All-Star to NEVER fail the Spider Walk. How can you credit that site as your source of information and then not read it??

As far as I can tell there are no factual errors in the text about Nagano, except he says he won on "the 17th try", which makes it sound like he personally tried seventeen times before winning and we know that's not how it went down.

The last thing is pretty hilarious though. I can see why they got it wrong, because it took me a while to find out what the truth was. However, if you can't find a fact, I don't think it counts as journalism to make some shit up instead of admitting you don't know it. So what is it that they did? They claim that Urushihara Yuuji is only 152 cm tall. At first I couldn't find a good source on this (it's not on Sasukepedia, and we know that is as far as Aftonbladet's research went), but even so THERE'S NO WAY IN HELL!?

If Urushihara is 152 cm, how short would that make Matachi Ryo?? And we know that he is 162, so unless that photo has been brutally manipulated then Urushihara is defintely taller than 152. Then I realized I should be able to find his height in Sasuke 27 where it was stated before everyone's performance, and sure enough, I was right on where I'd find the information, and I was right at guessing he's taller than Matachi Ryo. With one cm, but still:

But idk, actually taking the time to watch something you're writing an article about is clearly too much work, so I guess I'm being way too hard on the person who wrote the article. Making shit up when you don't know the facts is what true journalism is about, after all.

After this the article does have nice graphics of the Ninja Warrior SE stage, and hints as to what stage 2 will include, but given the factual errors we've seen so far I'm not gonna trust that to 100% until I see it on TV.

Should you happen to have Aftonbladet plus and wanna subject yourself to this inaccurate excuse for journalism you can read it here.

How to become obsessed with Sasuke

At last a subject we feel qualified to write about! After just under three weeks our obsession is just growing and growing, with no signs of stopping. Personally we think that's pretty impressive, and if you wanna follow in our footsteps, here's what we suggest you do:

First of all, take a look at this video. Don't worry, it's only 5 minutes. If you can't even manage that, you clearly don't have what it takes to love Sasuke.

Sooo ... did you watch that and think "yeah, that's the shit, right there, I definitely need more of this"? Good, then you're ready to begin your descent into Sasuke madness.

First of all you need to get your hands on a proper Sasuke episode. Not those American broadcasts of Sasuke, known as Ninja Warrior, no, no, those are for later, when things get desperate. You shouldn't have much trouble finding Sasuke 30, if you go to a bay near you or somewhere similar. We recommend you start with Sasuke 30 for several reasons: 1) it's easy to find, 2) it's the latest episode so nothing will feel dated, 3) most of our faves are in this episode, 4) you get to see all four stages, and 5) that's how we did it.

Now, just sit down and enjoy yourself. It's three hours long, but it's so worth. Of course, it's all in Japanese, and chances are you won't understand any of it, but that's okay. That's the beauty of it: when you don't understand the Japanese announcers, you have to make your own running commentary, and it's a lot of fun.

If you're lucky, you're friends with us and we can text you about all the people you will want to keep an eye out for. This pic is the notes our friend Hanna took during her Sasuke 30 watch, and we couldn't be more proud of her. If you're not lucky enough to have us on speed dial, Sasukepedia is helpful too. If you keep a look out fo the starting numbers of each contestant while browsing this page you'll soon start to figure out who everyone is.

It says:
Cute gymnast = 2996
Cute guy = 2994
He who always cries = 2998
Urushihara = 2993
___________________
2992 = Yamamoto Shingo - been in all episodes
2999 = Nagano - best of all
part of Allstars, (also 2980)

Or you can just make up nicknames, like Chriss and I did the first time. If you're not Japanese or familiar with Japanese names, refering to people as "the cute guy", "the tree-cutter", "the angry trainer"; "the guy with the hat" and so on will get you through your first watch.

If you've finished Sasuke 30 and is still totally into this, we recommend trying Sasuke 27 next. It's another good one, where we even gets ourselves a winner. By this point you should also be able to recognize some of the contestants, if you wanna become a total nerd.

You're still good? Not feeling that the show is being repetetive? Good! After this finding episodes gets more tricky, but we've gotten our hands on 24, 28 and 29. If you still need some time to adjust to the show, I'd recommend Sasuke 29: except for the weird Asean Cup stuff it's a pretty straight-forward show, and rather short at only 2:18. Sasuke 28 is good too, but that was the official rebranding to Sasuke Rising and cuts to some weird fancy dinner at random times. You'll only enjoy that if you have a somewhat good understanding of who the All-Stars are, because they're officially retired in that episode and that's hyped up a lot.

Text from Hanna, our most satisfied customer:
"Lit candles, bought candy, heat up the heat pad and cozied up in bed in front of Sasuke 28.
THANK YOU FOR INTRODUCING US TO THIS!!!"

Sasuke 24 is another great episode, but at 5:30 hours it demands a commitment you must be sure that you can endure before you embarge upon your journey.

If you've gotten this far, I trust you can make your own decisions on what to watch next, althoughtfinding the full Japenese broadcasts will get trickier. The Ninja Warrior episodes - Sasuke but in the shortened American format - is your last desperate resource. With these you can go back and watch the first few episodes, which of course will be of interest to the beginning Sasuke fan. We've seen 1-4 in the Ninja Warrior style, and while it works we much prefer the Japanese broadcasts where we can get them. It is cool to see the All-Stars at their best though, even if the course is a lot more awesome in the later seasons.

Once you've gotten this far, all you can do is spam twitter, accept the fact that all your conversations from now on will be about Sasuke, start a blog and start training for your next opportunity to appear on the show. This is your life now.

Ninja Warrior Party

As I was browsing Pinterest, I stumbled upon (okay, I searched for "Sasuke, Ninja Warrior") pictures of these amazing Ninja Warrior Party decorations. And since Ell's birthday is coming up, I know what theme we'll have ...

Click on the picture to see it on Pinterest!
I tried to find the source for it, but no luck :(

Source: Swishprintables.com

You can also buy the printable version for these decoration at SwishPrintables Etsy store!

Now all I have to do is try to bake a cake, hmm ...

Why Sasuke hipsters?

So why did we decide on this name? Well ...

Neither of us had watched a second of Sasuke before the Ninja Warrior SE first aired. We'd barely heard about it: I had seen some American Ninja Warrior gifs (like the streaker guy) on tumblr, but that was basically it. However, it seemed cool enough and about two weeks ago I watched the first episode.

The day after that I kept talking to Chriss about how much I'd enjoyed it: you either got to see amazing athletic feats, or you got people completely messing up and you could laugh about it. Perfect show to watch for entertainment.

How exactly the idea to watch Sasuke 30 came to be after that I'm not sure about, but for some reason it seemed like a reasonable thing to do: to watch three hours of a game show in a language we didn't understand at all. And this from the girls who put of watching Boyhood for several months because "it's two hours and forty-five minutes, that's so looong" (we have since watched Boyhood, and we can assure you that Sasuke is better).

So watched it, and we loved it. Quite early on we started to see what we refer to as our "hipster" tendencies: that we would in every instance prefer the unsubbed japanese episodes to anything else. We watched some Ninja Warrior (japanese Sasuke broadcasted in USA, not to be confused with American Ninja Warrior) and found that even with the benefit of subtitles we didn't like them shortening down the episodes with several hours.

This was after seeing our first Sasuke ep.

Then we watched the second episode of the Ninja Warrior SE and realized how easy that first stage was compared to the current Sasuke first stage and at that point the "this is why the japanese original is so much better" was our standard phrase whenever watching something that wasn't unsubbed Sasuke eps:

And keep in mind that this was less than week after we first heard of the show, and just three days after we'd seen our first ever Sasuke episode.

So naming ourselves the Sasuke hipsters when starting this blog? Yeah, it seemed like the most obvious thing to do.

Ninja Warrior Sverige: Stage One

Three episodes in we have gotten to know the first stage (known as the qualifying round) in the Swedish Ninja Warrior rather well. Since it's based on the American format rather than good old Sasuke, 125 competitors are starting out and the 25 (or is it 30? I must say I'm not entirely sure) with the best time will move on to "the semifinal", which is what should be known as Stage 2.

Anyway, stage 1 is as follows:

Source: Kanal5play.se

We start out with a classic, the Quintuple Step. I love it when people fail this one, it's always such an amazing let-down to fail on the first obstace.

Source: Kanal5play.se

I've spent forever trying to figure out the English name for this one? I haven't seen it outside of Sweden yet, but I know it exists because I've seen this superhot pic of Asa Kazuma doing it in the USA vs Japan special (which we haven't got our hands on yet, something that pains me every day).

After looking it up on YouTube it seems to be kinda like the Hang Slider, although I've yet to see anyone rotate while doing it. Mostly they fail because they grab one handle too quick and then the other shoots up and away from them.

(Edit: it is called the Silk Slider, thank you, Arsenette!)

Source: Kanal5play.se

Next up is the Cross Bridge, and I can't recall if we've seen anyone fail it. After the quintuple step it doesn't seem to be giving anyone much trouble, as long as they don't trip.

Source: Kanal5play.se

Okay, but NOTHING is funnier than seeing someone make a spectacular jump on the Jump Hang, grab onto the rope and then get fucked over by gravity and fall into the water. They always look so shocked and I always laugh. This one gets SUPERCLOSE to the water when you climb under it, and several competitors have failed just because their tees dropped into the water. Baggy clothes isn't very ninja.

Source: Kanal5play.se

Spider Climb! A classic. It's just 8 meters long, nothing is moving and doesn't involve going up or down or through any kind of obstacles. Compared to what we've seen in Sasuke it's not really that impressive (and looking at how people move through it you can see the different between seasoned Sasuke competitors and Swedes who've never done this before).

Source: Kanal5play.se

And of course, a classic at the end: the Warped Wall. I think it's 4 meters high, which isn't that impressive compared to Japan's 4.5, especially not given how much taller Swedes tend to be compared to Japanese people. Since time is counting up, not down, you only get three tries on it, like in the American version.

When I first watched this, never having seen any of Sasuke, I found stage 1 pretty impressive but having seen it's more recent Japanese incarnations we're mostly rolling our eyes. I don't wanna talk shit about my gender (girls are the best), but two women have passed it so far and saying "she is one of only three in the world to finish stage 1!!!" sort of loses its charm when it's so much easier than the original. Even so, here's Jenny Adolfsson (known from Swedish Gladiators) looking great while finishing it:

Since it is based on the American version rather than Sasuke stage 2 is apparently just gonna be a repeat of stage 1 that is slightly harder, adding the Salmon Ladder, Arm Rings and Rope Ladder after Stage 1. I'll post an update once we've seen that on TV, and I'll definitely keep you posted on stage 3.

Anyway, I'm off because later tonight I'm forcing a friend of ours to watch Sasuke for the first time. I'm sure she'll love it just as much as we do.