Friday, March 20, 2015

Ninja Warrior SE: stage three, part one

Technically, this is referred to as "stage one" since what we called stage one on the blog is "qualifying round" and stage two is "semifinals". Yeah, why not? Technically this is also just the same stage we've seen a few times by now, but with some modifications. Hey, why change something that works?

As we saw yesterday, this proved to be quite a challenge for the aspiring ninjas anyway, so maybe it's best to ease into it. I'm sort of hoping the course will be brutally upgraded for next season so that everyone who scoffed at how easy it is (myself included), will immediately fail. A girl can dream, right?

Source: Kanal5play.se
Yes, the Quintuple Step - again. You'd think the contestants would be laughing at this by now, but since we actually saw a guy fail it yesterday, you'd be wrong. This just proves one of the things we love about this show, namely that YOU'RE NEVER SAFE.

Source: Kanal5play.se
This obstacle has changed again, and now it is the Tarzan Rope. Probably easier than the Hang Glider, but there's a longer jump which makes it harder to time.

Source: Kanal5play.se
Cross-Bridge is exactly the same.

Source: Kanal5play.se
Source: Kanal5play.se
Since the angle on the Jump Hang isn't the same in the pics it's hard to tell, but to me it felt like it had changed? It looked like a longer jump than in stage two/semis, but they didn't mention it so I guess it wasn't. They could have gone with Jump Hang Kai here though, that would've been fun.

Source: Kanal5play.se
The "Jumping" Spider. We can't say it without the airquotes, because look at it: no trampoline, no half-circle structure, and no distance to the obstacle. Yeah, it's obviously harder than the Spider Walk we saw before this, but compared to Sasuke, it's a joke. Sorry.

Source: Kanal5play.se
The Warped Wall is "four meters and a little more". How much is a little more? No one ever seems to know.

Source: Kanal5play.se
The Salmon Ladder is still here, but this time around you have to climb five steps before you can go on to the ...

Source: Kanal5play.se
Unstable Bridge! Definitely last episode's Ninja Killer. At first people couldn't even deal with the first bridge, but even those who did lost their grip on the second one. One guy almost finished it, but messed up his jump and slipped of the mattress. Classic Sasuke.

Source: Kanal5play.se
Finally we have the Spider Climb, or "the Chimney" as it's called in Swedish. I can't get over that name. Only one dude finished it, but he had trouble since his technique, having one leg bent and one straight, works a lot better on the Spider Walk/Jumping Spider than it does on this one. Study the Japanese ninjas and you'll see how it should be done.

In ep 9 we also got a good look at the next stage, known as stage two, although I'm calling it the finale part two. I'm not making a separate post on it until we see it in action, because I'm not sure about the order of the obstacles, but here's what they'll face:

Source: Kanal5play.se
That's the order (left to right) they were shown in this ep, but they can't be serious about having the Wall Lifting and then two more obstacles??? Not only is that wrong, it might kill someone. Though to be fair, this course will probably kill them all before they even get that far. It's starting with the Pipe Slider to a Tarzan Rope??? And then there's a rope, the Doorknob Grasper, FOLLOWED BY ANOTHER ROPE. Nah, sure, that's totally reasonable, especially given what we've seen so far. Totally.

Oh, and the third obstacle, that half-moon rope-thingy? It's called the Death Rope in Swedish. I haven't found it on Sasukepedia, so I don't know if it's a thing in any of the other Sasuke competitions, but I suggest that we all start using that name, because it's badass.

Also, you might not be able to tell from these pictures, but rain is POURING by this point. I don't know if it still does when the contestants get to them, but if it does ... well, they're fucking screwed, you know? No way will they survive that.

In any case, it seems we have a very interesting last episode to expect. Well, if anyone survives that Pipe Slider, that is.

Until then: sayonara ninja lovers!

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